I hate when I lose sight of who I am, of what I stand for. I hate realizing that in some ways I was much smarter when I was younger than I am now.

It’s learning, some say. These are lessons and experiences and mistakes that make you into a stronger person, they say.

But instead it just feels like losing.

I was already a strong person. And somehow I lost that. I was completely clear and able to make decisions in black and white. Now so much seems gray.

Maybe that is learning… or maybe it’s losing. Losing your character. Losing your identity, looking in the mirror…

Who is that?

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